I am NO expert on parenting...is there such thing? I don't think so. I think we are all just making it up as we go. I think there is SO much information out there about how to be a good mom and raise your kids "right" that it can get scary! I find myself thinking "Maybe I shouldn't do this, maybe I should do that, What is the right thing to do! What if I totally mess up my kids! Then I start thinking, what would this person think if I did this etc... It's NOT helpful! Am I the only one who does that?
I once went to a fireside and shared about how I had been struggling with fears and doubts about my ability to be a mother and how I felt totally inadequate. After the fireside I had about 10 women come up to me and tell me they felt the exact same way. And one Lady handed me a note that said, "I felt like you feel for 20 years, you are a GOOD mother"
We don't have to be perfect to be a good mom and we don't have to have it all figured out. We don't have to pretend we're perfect for our children, it may be helpful for them to see us struggle and persevere and stay strong and face our doubts and master our fears. If we talk about our feelings and fears with them then maybe they will feel like then can share their feelings with us. I think our struggles and imperfections are what make us human and we're all here experiencing this struggle through mortality together. We were put in families so that we can encourage and lift and support one another
Two things have helped me lately with my toddlers; One is focusing on helping them solve problems. When they throw a tantrum or cry, sometimes I get really annoyed, like what is so wrong and can you just stop, you're driving me nuts. But if I stop and think, what's the problem and how can we solve it and then we solve it together then everything is good again. They learn how to solve problems and don't get so frustrated. They play way better together and I don't fear tantrums! I welcome them as an opportunity to help solve a problem. I think it's working anyways.
I think it helps to just recognize that Parenthood is messy! It just is. It's perfect for no one and we just have to do our best! What matters is that we love and guide our children. There is no one perfect way to parent. You are unique and your child is unique, so follow your heart and don't forget to enjoy your children! Don't get so caught up in trying to make them great that you forget they are inherently great. I don't think we mold our children like clay, I think they are like seeds. We give them water and sunshine and love and they grow into who they aren't meant to be.
What makes Heavenly Father the best dad? A few things are that he sees you as you can become, he sees the best in you! he is always there for you to talk to. He teaches and loves and corrects but he never discourages. He believes in you. He is a good example. He would do anything for you- even watch one of his most beloved children die for you. I think the important thing is that we are there for our children and that we pray and ask for help and blessings! Our faithful prayers really can send heavens help to bless our children and fill in the gaps of our imperfections. Somehow Heavenly Father trusts all of us imperfect people with his children. He really sees who we can become! He is in charge and this is his plan, so we just have to trust.
I think Family time and traditions are one of the best offenses in creating a family. Tonight we made my Healthier plant based brownies and had brownies and ice cream/nice cream. If you want the recipe here it is! Even my husband loves these ones! And i'm sure i'll be posting more later about plant-based eating and how it has helped me overcome food addiction and improve my mental well-being if you are at all interested :) Here's the recipe...
http://thevegan8.com/2016/04/29/fudgy-secret-low-fat-brownies/
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