If you're anything like me your default is to think of the one little thing you did wrong during the day instead of the hundred things you did right. Marjorie Pay Hinckley once said "Don't dwell on all your failures but think of your successes" In the program booklet we have for young women at my church it says "Make sure you give yourself credit for the good things you do each day"
Did you know that when students get 80 out of 100 on a test they are more ready to admit that they missed 20 then that they got 80 right.
I'm not sure this way of thinking really helps us. Sometimes I think I have to focus on all the negatives to fix them, but what you focus on grows. Wouldn't it be more helpful to think about all the positives and build on that? Heavenly Father wants to build us up and encourage us. Satan wants to tear us down and his ultimate goal is for us to become as miserable as he is.
I mistakenly think sometimes that it's selfish or prideful to think of my successes or give myself a pat on the back. But isn't it true that we treat others the way we treat ourselves? Doesn't the commandment say, to love others as ourselves? I'm not so sure that Heavenly Father is pleased when we are mean to ourselves. He loves us. We are his children and I never want my daughters to be mean to themselves.
Who would perform better; Sally or Tom?
Sally: Starts her day with thoughts of everything she's doing wrong. It's never good enough unless it's perfect. She focuses on where she's lacking and never gives herself credit for the good things she does. Some days she gives up and doesn't even want to try because she can't handle the self criticism anymore. It's easier to just play it safe and not do anything. She tries to control and predict and please, perform and perfect to avoid criticism and judgement. Her number one goal was to avoid any mistake at all costs even if that means staying in her comfort zone.The day went smoothly and comfortably but did she really progress much?
Tom: His goal today is to progress, to pursue excellence. But he knows that that path is sometimes scary and sometimes messy. But he's ok with it. His goal is not to succeed, his goal is to give it 110%, to give it all of him. He has a healthy perspective of both his strengths and his weaknesses. He uses his strengths to love and help others but he is aware of his weaknesses and never lets his guard down. He see's mistakes (reasonable ones;) as wonderful opportunities to learn. He knows that this life is the 2nd act of a 3 act play. It's the messy act. The act where things don't make sense sometimes. The act where we learn and grow the most. The act where we roll up our sleeves and dive in. He let's go, and lets God. He trusts and lets himself be led into the dark, one step at a time. He's not afraid of failure because he knows that failure is part of success not the opposite of it.
Did you know that when students get 80 out of 100 on a test they are more ready to admit that they missed 20 then that they got 80 right.
I'm not sure this way of thinking really helps us. Sometimes I think I have to focus on all the negatives to fix them, but what you focus on grows. Wouldn't it be more helpful to think about all the positives and build on that? Heavenly Father wants to build us up and encourage us. Satan wants to tear us down and his ultimate goal is for us to become as miserable as he is.
I mistakenly think sometimes that it's selfish or prideful to think of my successes or give myself a pat on the back. But isn't it true that we treat others the way we treat ourselves? Doesn't the commandment say, to love others as ourselves? I'm not so sure that Heavenly Father is pleased when we are mean to ourselves. He loves us. We are his children and I never want my daughters to be mean to themselves.
Who would perform better; Sally or Tom?
Sally: Starts her day with thoughts of everything she's doing wrong. It's never good enough unless it's perfect. She focuses on where she's lacking and never gives herself credit for the good things she does. Some days she gives up and doesn't even want to try because she can't handle the self criticism anymore. It's easier to just play it safe and not do anything. She tries to control and predict and please, perform and perfect to avoid criticism and judgement. Her number one goal was to avoid any mistake at all costs even if that means staying in her comfort zone.The day went smoothly and comfortably but did she really progress much?
Tom: His goal today is to progress, to pursue excellence. But he knows that that path is sometimes scary and sometimes messy. But he's ok with it. His goal is not to succeed, his goal is to give it 110%, to give it all of him. He has a healthy perspective of both his strengths and his weaknesses. He uses his strengths to love and help others but he is aware of his weaknesses and never lets his guard down. He see's mistakes (reasonable ones;) as wonderful opportunities to learn. He knows that this life is the 2nd act of a 3 act play. It's the messy act. The act where things don't make sense sometimes. The act where we learn and grow the most. The act where we roll up our sleeves and dive in. He let's go, and lets God. He trusts and lets himself be led into the dark, one step at a time. He's not afraid of failure because he knows that failure is part of success not the opposite of it.
What do you think? I think I need to try to live more like Tom.
"We sometimes, as women, have a tendency to be very critical of ourselves. During these times we need to seek the Spirit and ask, “Is this what the Lord wants me to think about myself, or is Satan trying to beat me down?” Remember the nature of our Heavenly Father, whose love is perfect and infinite. He wants to build us up, not tear us down." -Linda S. Reeves (Claim the Blessings of your Covenants)
"God is not waiting to love you until you have overcome your weaknesses and bad habits. He loves you today with a full understanding of your struggles. He knows of your remorse for the times you have fallen short or failed. And still He loves you.
And God knows of your successes; though they may seem small to you, He acknowledges and cherishes each one of them. He knows everything about you. He sees you clearly—He knows you as you really are. And He loves you—today and always!"
-Dieter F. Uchtdorf (Live the Gospel Joyful)
-Dieter F. Uchtdorf (Live the Gospel Joyful)
My Aunt posted this on facebook the other day and I am IN LOVE with it:
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