Lately I have been overwhelmed with thinking about my life and where I was and where I am now and how much I have been through. Sometimes I can't even believe I am where I am. Sometimes I thought the pain of my parents divorce, ED and other things would never go away. Like life would never be the same again. And its not, its better. If I my future self could talk to my past self I would have told myself to NEVER give up and keep on fighting that things really would get better. I really believe that you can't truly feel happiness without knowing misery, and the deeper pain you know the greater joy you feel. I am just so grateful for the GIFTS of recovery, my life is even better than before my ED and parents divorce. Maybe not like I would have planned it or ever wanted it. But God knows what is best for us better than we do. A favorite quote of mine is "if you want to make god laugh, tell him your plans" ha ha There are a lot of things and people that have helped me overcome my challenges, who I am so beyond GRATEFUL for. But most of all I know that the HEALING power of the savior of the world is REAL, and that he can literally heal us and he has blessing in abundance waiting for us as we strive to CHANGE our lives. I know that is true with all my heart. Sometimes I think...what if I did give up! What if I didn't keep going and white knuckle it? I would have missed out on so much. I just want to tell everyone to not give up, whatever it is that you struggle with. Don't give up. You're never alone, ask your savior to help you and he will. Remember perfect people don't need a savior. The greatest blessing for me that has come out of recovery is coming to know my savior,I wouldn't trade that for anything. I know I wouldn't be able to do it without him. I know he is healing me and putting me through the refiners fire, such is the purpose of life. I know I still have a lot to work on, but I have come so far! I know that Christ works miracles everyday still, I feel him working one in my life, even though I am so undeserving. I know he will work miracles in your life if you'll just take his hand. I know that things DO get better and that people DO change.
